Congratulations on the new job! Hope they have a better coffee machine, because let's be honest, that's what truly matters.
Thrilled to hear you're moving on! Now you can finally escape all the 'synergizing' and 'paradigm shifts' we subjected you to. You're welcome.
Turn this into a beautiful card for Client
Send a private link they'll actually want to open — not just a text. Free, no account needed.
Best of luck! You'll probably realize how good you had it here in about three weeks, but by then, it'll be too late. Enjoy!
Wishing you all the best at your new role. Just try not to enlighten your new boss on *everything* you learned from us. Some things are best kept secret.
Hope your new job is everything you've ever dreamed of, and by 'dreamed of,' I mean 'significantly less work for significantly more pay.' A man can dream, right?
None of these feel quite right?
Add a personal detail — a memory, a name — and get something made just for your Client.
We'll really miss you... trying to figure out how to use the printer. Best of luck with new, more complicated office equipment!
May your new commute be short, your meetings be few, and your work-life balance be something other than a mythical creature. We had fun while it lasted, mostly.
Go forth and conquer! Or at least, go forth and prove all those people who said you couldn't do it... totally right. Kidding! Mostly.
So glad to hear you're starting fresh! Here's hoping your new colleagues are at least 50% less annoying than your old ones. A low bar, I know.
Good luck with the new challenge! Just remember, you can always come back... to visit... when you need a good laugh about your past mistakes.
Common questions
How do I make these wishes sound genuine despite the sarcasm?‹
Deliver with a playful smirk, a knowing wink, or follow up with a real (but brief) compliment. The key is in the delivery – a lighthearted tone ensures the sarcasm lands as humor, not offense.
Is it appropriate to send sarcastic wishes to a client?‹
Absolutely, *if* you have an established, informal, and robust relationship with them where humor is appreciated. If there's any doubt about their sense of humor or the professional boundaries, opt for something more genuinely warm. You know your client best!
What if my client doesn't get the sarcasm?‹
That's the risk with humor! If they seem genuinely confused or offended, a quick, sincere apology clarifying your playful intent should smooth things over. Blame it on your 'unique sense of humor' and quickly pivot to a more straightforward congratulations.