Merry Christmas, sis! May your presents be as disappointing as your cooking.
Hope Santa brings you what you really deserve this year, which is probably a lump of coal and a reality check.
Turn this into a beautiful card for Sister
Send a private link they'll actually want to open — not just a text. Free, no account needed.
To my dearest sister, may your Christmas be brighter than your future relationship status.
Merry Christmas! Don't worry, even if you gained 10 pounds from all the holiday treats, I'll still love you... from a safe distance.
Wishing you a Christmas full of joy, and may you finally learn to fold your laundry before next year.
None of these feel quite right?
Add a personal detail — a memory, a name — and get something made just for your Sister.
Here's to a Christmas as wild and chaotic as your decision-making skills. Good luck, sis!
Merry Christmas, sis! May your holiday spirit be as high as your screen time.
Hope your Christmas is filled with everything you wished for, just like my childhood was filled with your hand-me-downs.
Another Christmas, another year you haven't mastered basic adulting. There's always next year, right? Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas to the sister who still owes me money from that time... you know the one. Maybe Santa will pay it for you?
Common questions
How can I ensure my sister understands it's a joke?‹
The best way is to know your sister's sense of humor! Pair these wishes with a genuine smile, a playful nudge, and perhaps a small, actual gift she'll love. It's all about the delivery and the existing bond.
Are these wishes appropriate for all sisters?‹
These 'savage' wishes are intended for sisters with a strong sense of humor and a playful relationship where teasing is common. If your sister is sensitive or doesn't appreciate playful roasts, it might be better to opt for more traditional, heartfelt messages.
What if she roasts me back?‹
Consider it a success! The goal of a good roast is usually to elicit a reaction, and a reciprocal roast means the playful banter is well-received. Be prepared to laugh and dish out some more!